Let’s get started…
I’ve decided to republish the original posts from May 2020. I didn’t know about my disorders then. I just knew that I was tired of being pushed around and being hurt for something that I couldn’t control. I wanted to spread the word; to speak out to let others know that they aren’t alone.
Any notes from 2021 Amber will be highlighted in purple.
This was an introductory post, originally published on April 30, 2020…something that all the How-To blog articles say that you need. I was ready to take a stand. This was the beginning of my journey.
Sometimes you need to be awkward to beat awkwardness. --Charlie Flynn
I’ve agonized over this first post. Really just the first paragraph of the first post. It’s awkward and I’m awkward, so let me just dive right in: I am 38 years old. A mother and a spouse. A writer. A nap taker. A believer in the power of art. A nature lover who rarely goes outside. A dreamer. A soft heart. I am a friend. I am a reader. I am a daughter, a sister, an aunt, a niece, and a granddaughter. I am a thousand different things; a thousand tiny pieces fitted together to make me who I am.
I have also lived with mental illness for most of my life. This blog is my way of bringing a voice to all of the people like me who are trying their best to live their very best life, while living with chronic mental illness. My mental health journey is long and twisty with not even a vague end in sight. I have felt let down and abandoned and alone; misunderstood, unseen, and not taken seriously. I’m here now because I want people to know that they are not alone; that there is hope and there is understanding. I see you.
With The Winter Blog, I intend on sharing my own long and continuing journey living with mental illness. With a mix of my own stories, featured stories from other survivors, interviews, and resources for crisis intervention and mental health recovery, I hope to create a community where people feel safe and supported and less alone.
So, who exactly am I writing for? Well, I’m writing for me, foremost. Nothing I wrote would be effective if I did it for any one else. I’m also writing for every little girl with an inexplicable sadness growing deep inside her. I’m writing for every teenager gripped by an anxiety so severe that she sits on the couch , staring into the darkness until well after the sun has come up. I’m writing for the 24-year-old who hasn’t showered or brushed their teeth or even gotten out of bed in days because the sadness has turned to pain and the pain is deep and all-encompassing. For all of the 30-somethings who have hardened on the inside; finally numb from the pain, but also from the joy, happiness, and excitement that makes life…life. I will be your voice, if you will have me.
I hope that you’ll join me on this road and I hope that it helps you. I am still learning about a lot of things, blogging and advocacy included. Please bear with me. Feel free to contact me with any suggestions, comments, or even just to say hi! If you would like to contribute your story, please let me know.